First, I’m sorry for worrying anyone.  Was not my intention to create drama.

We’ve been experiencing a great deal of upheaval here since Wednesday and while I am maintaining an outward appearance of “I’m ok” - I can barely form a coherent thought on the inside.

Rhino discovered he had a 13 year old daughter Wednesday night.  Apparently her mother (an ex of Rhino’s) found his contact info and gave it to her.  The young girl called my house looking for Rhino Wednesday night.  When I offered to take a message and pass it on, she referred to herself as his daughter.  I assumed one of his buddies was playing a prank.

I emailed Rhino the message, along with a list of things we needed to do this week end.  Within 5 minutes my phone rang.  He recognized the last name but wanted to make sure I got the first name right.  He thought I had taken a message from his ex.  I clarified the name and mentioned that it was a young girl that called, not a woman.

This is the point where my stomach started doing the roller coaster.

He called me back 30 minutes later saying he had a flight home first thing in the morning.  Oh and that girl?  Yeah, she’s a daughter I never knew I had.

Cue full blown nausea.

What I know at this point:

The “mother” has decided she’s tired of all the responsibility and thinks it’s Rhino’s turn.

Rhino and his “daughter” are getting DNA testing done today before we go any further.

She attends the same school as WB and they live 5 blocks from us. 

Needless to say, Rhino is in a state of shock.  He is one of the most honourable men I know and the fact that he has had a daughter out there for 13 years that he was not supporting is killing him.  The fact that this woman kept her from him for 13 years has made him angrier than I have ever witnessed.

He called “the Ex” last night and there was a lot of yelling, swearing and a slamming of the phone at the end.  Suffice it to say this woman basically wants to dump her child as it’s become a hindrance in her life.  That alone makes me want to move this girl into our home ASAP - DNA or not.

So we are now sitting and waiting.  We hope to have the results by Monday - Tuesday.  This week end is going to involve a lot of “what if” talks and some serious drinking.  I know I shouldn’t but I figure a couple vodkas are worth the subsequent pain.  I’m in need of some numbness.

 

This is one of those posts.

Things have done a 180 at Josie World and for me to put it all into words will require another day.

Nothing like a move date or a pregnancy.

Things have been beyond busy of late.

I have officially booked my surgery for June 30th.  In and out the same day which makes me very happy.  On my arse at home for the remainder of the week and then back to the office.  I say back to the office, as I will be working from home Wed thru Friday.

WB has his last day of school tomorrow and then exams start on Thursday.  He will officially be done high school at 11:30am Monday June 23rd.  On the road to this momentous day, my dining room table has been overrun with pop cans, junk food wrappers, crumpled balls of paper, text books, assorted scientific calculators and electronic gadgets.  This is how my son studies.  I wish I had a door to shut so I didn’t have to look.

On the 24th he is officially off to camp for the summer and other than the occaisional weekend, will not be back till August 23rd.  And then a week later - off to University.

Our 2 COO’s are here from the US and one of them is quite out spoken.  In front of the wanker, the following has been said:

“I understand Josie is the glue that holds this office together.”

“I often say, if the wanker is to be congratulated for something - Josie probably did it.”

“We’ll find out in 2 weeks if wanker can hold it together without Josie to hold his hand.”

I think I love this man

I had the following conversation with WB last night:

WB:  Did you send in my pic for the University ID?

Me:  No.  Why would I have sent in YOUR ID?

WB:  They sent me a letter saying they never got it.  I figured cause I showed it to you, you would take care of it.

Me:  That was 2 months ago!!  I told you to go get a pic taken and gave you money.  Where’s the picture?

WB:  I forgot.  Why didn’t you remind me?  I only have 10 days now.

Me:  And you wonder why I’m worried about you on your own.  Book smart, reality dense.

This morning via text:

WB:  Where’s my camera?

Me:  I’ll bite.  Where’s your camera?

WB:  Seriously Mom, where did I put it.

Me:  Re-read that text.

WB:  Just tell me where I would’ve put it!!!!!!  I’m going to be late for school.

Me:  No clue as it’s YOURS and I’m at work.

WB:  Thanks for nothing.

Me:  I worry for this country’s future.

This afternoon via text:

WB:  Hey, can you get Dad a father’s day card for me.

Me:  No.

WB:  I’m busy.  Please!

Me:  Doing?

WB:  At the lake for the festival.  Love you forever if you do.

Me:  Empty promise.  I’m footing the bill for school.

Me:  Cripes are you lazy.

WB:  You rock!  Love ya.

Me:  I didn’t say yes.

…..no reply.  And yes I bought the card.  A little worried about him functioning on his own.  Scurvy anyone?

WB is all for me moving to Ottawa.  This surprised me a little.

Although he has been quick to point out I was apprehensive about him moving to Kingston for school (not that far from Ottawa for my US friends) and now that’s where I’m going.  I was doubly quick to point out that as a parent it’s “Do as I say, not as I do.”  Yeah right.

Alison, I will bring my own vodka hon.  No worries:)  Mim- pizza/bbq definitely.  Jen - hang onto the Toronto Guide books, I’ll still be here then and can’t wait

On an unexpected side note, my 2 month late review has been scheduled for early next week.  By me?  No, when I asked it was a “trivial matter he had no time for.”  It was scheduled by the wanker.  Coinciding visit the following day by the big guys from the US an incentive?  I think so.

Bell Canada?  Our “major” phone company here?  Needs to kiss my ass.  Lost 3 hours of my life today trying to transfer our Business lines successfully.  At one point had no phones.  At another, no ability to send out a fax.  This shouldn’t be this hard.  Really.

Rhino needs to stop sending me MLS listings of homes in Ottawa.  All I’m wanting to do is reno mine.  Which brings the bigger issue I just realized - I have to sell my house if I move.  Yes, I totally forgot that fact.

Tomorrow?  A wonderful story of a long suffering mother of an 18yr old and his back ass version of reality.

 

 

Lord do you people know me.  And boy did I know Alison and Mim would be all over the move closer

It’s not all about control, more I’ve been solely responsible for WB and I for so long………I don’t know how to let someone else take “the reins.”  And Rhino doesn’t want control so much as to offer me the luxury of not having to work multiple jobs to pay the bills and to take the time to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.

Rhino’s right in that WB will be off making his own life.  My Mom’s right in that now is the time for me to have my own life.  Everyone is right in that it’s a 4 hr drive away.

And the fantasies of telling the wanker?  Of only giving the legally required 2 weeks, even though I would know long before hand?  Lovely.  Absolutely lovely.

Things are still in early negotiations but suffice it to say, they are swaying towards a move.  A move.  Not a wedding, a move.  Baby steps people.

And Rhino, if you’re reading this?  You still have some selling to do, so don’t think you’ve won.

As if this Monday hasn’t been full of enough crap and upheaval, as reported in the previous post….Rhino has been offered a transfer.

Don’t bother getting excited.  I did, only to find out it’s to Ottawa.  Still not commuting distance.

And this transfer?  Comes with a housing allowance, a corporate condo till he finds a house, a 45% increase in salary and a contract that says he’ll stay for 2 years.  WOOT Rhino!!  Very happy he is finally realizing all his dreams in the field of Marketing.  I am.

Me?  Faced with the following:

Rhino:  No reason you can’t move out here with me in September.

Josie:  What about WB?  And my sister’s wedding?  And my job?  My jobs??

Rhino:  WB will be making his own way in Guelph.  You can come back for your sister’s wedding.  You can quit your jobs.  I will be making 4x what you make at your full time.  Take some time and find something you’re happy at.  Go back to school.  Volunteer.  Become a bum.

Josie:  But….I…but…

Rhino:  You work on those excuses babe.  As of September you have nothing.  Sucks not to be in the driver’s seat, doesn’t it?

Josie:  I need time.

Rhino:  You have 3 months.  I’ll send you listings to look at.

Josie:…….

When father’s say they are “babysitting” their own flesh and blood.  Drives me batty.

Putting me as your email and voicemail contact when you’re out of the office…..and not telling me.

Four days of temperatures above 100F.

Making promises to my kid and not following through.

WB’s University for not taking credit card payments because heaven forbid we might collect a few points.

What looks like a fifth day of over 100F temps tomorrow.

The lack of fat, sugary food in my diet right now.

The fact I can’t get a surgeon who does the laproscopic gallbladder surgery till the end of July.

The cleanse I tried this week end.  Umm, not doing that again anytime soon.

Mondays in general.

I was late getting to work this morning because of the blinding pain in my right side.  Once at work, I could only sit for 20 minute intervals before I’d have to go lie down on the couch for 5 minutes.  The codeine was only managing to make me loopy.  Funny for my co-workers, not so much for me.

At 2pm I finally caved and told the wanker I had to go home, I couldn’t take it anymore.  His response?

“You need to focus on your health and your family.  This is more important than work.  Go home rest and take all the time you need.”

This from the same man who wouldn’t let me take WB to his chemo treatments.  He must be medicated.

On another note, thank you for all the kind words about my cousin’s wife.  I know they have made huge strides in breast cancer treatment.  I’m just feeling at a loss.  I am so very tired of hearing the word cancer.

The only happy note today?  I have lost 4 pounds.  That is the only bonus to this whole gall bladder thing.  And I asked about surgery dates today.  Either mid July, when I’m in Nashville for work or September.  Looks like I’m riding the vegetarian wave till September.

 

Sorry for all the doom and gloom but it’s been a rough couple of days.

My favourite cousin’s wife has been diagnosed with breast cancer.  I was one of her bridesmaid’s.  He is as close to a brother as you can get.  I thought I was okay till I talked to Mike (my cousin) and he started crying.  The man is a Staff Sergeant with his local police force, a member of the SWAT team and in tears.  Breaks my heart.

My godson, who I had on the weekend, has been diagnosed with a heart problem I don’t totally understand and need to research.  It’s very hard to believe that this active, rambunctious 2 year old has any health problems.

WB is all better and planning life after high school - Countdown 20 days.

I am ok.  No more vodka, all fruits and vegetables.  Any dairy, meat, etc causes blinding pain - so I am unfortunately a vegetarian.  No coffee, no black tea, no chocolate, no dairy, no meat….no fun.  I am grumpy.

Aren’t you glad you stopped by?