No Internal Editor

Just a touch base to let everyone know I am alive and well.

The kids are good.  WB is home from University and wearing down every last nerve I have by finding the only job known to man that lets you sleep till 2pm in the afternoon and be done by six.  Tutoring.  Kid is a genius.  WG is gearing up for a play and a dance.  All in all the kidlets are good.

I’m not a hundred percent sure where to start back here as so much has happened since I kind of disappeared.  A lot of it life changing and still being processed.

I’m breaking in a new laptop with this post, so while I figure it out, know I’ll be back tomorrow with more.

If you’ve stuck around – thanks:)

First, a big thank you to Badness Jones for the wonderful chocolate and the adorable card.

Second - anyone know how I can add Twitter to my blog??  I don’t know where I’m suppose to be putting things since everything changed around here.

Third - I have a lovely post coming to you tomorrow all about the letter S. 

Fourth – I’m going to Manchester, NH next week for work.  Any suggestions on where to eat at night?

Fifth – Anyone else over winter??????

There has been a long running joke here at the office about the “Employee of the Month”.  There are only four of us and one is the wanker, so the pool is small.

For Christmas the graphic designer, an eccentric Polish woman who requires a whole blog post on her own, made me a present.

She hand made me an award for every month of 2008.  On each “award” is the month, my name and the words, Employee of the Month.

I decided to don them a la Michael Phelps and email it to some people in the company.  Your Christmas present from me?  A picture of me with my “awards” and a muffin top I didn’t have when I got dressed in the morning.  WTF?!?

HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE!!! 

CUE THE EXCESSIVE EATING & DRINKING.

So far everyone but me has had the flu and/or the cold from hell.  I know its shocking that I haven’t caught it yet but I think that’s cause I haven’t sat down long enough for it to catch me.

WB is doing well at school but came home this past wknd to be taken care of by Mom, only to find WG had taken over the couch.  And while I still believe men make the worst patients, WG gave them a run for their money.  I do believe acting is in her immediate future.

Rhino drove 3 hours to be waited on hand and foot while he moaned and complained over his cold, only to discover he had been trumped by the kidlets.

And the snow.  Please.  It’s not winter yet – there are 33 more days till its official – and the temp today is -13C (8.6F) and we have snow on the ground.  With more to come.  I am sooo not ready for this shit.

Lots going on in the office.  A little over a week ago the wanker was put in his place not just by his boss but by our CEO as well.  Since that time he has bent over backwards to be nice to me.  Complimenting my work, not questioning my hours, etc.  Will this last?  I highly doubt it but am milking it for everything its worth right now:)

And just because, here is a picture of WB’s room at University, with a few extra people in it and showing clearly that tidiness is not his thing.

I had the following conversation with WB last night:

WB:  Did you send in my pic for the University ID?

Me:  No.  Why would I have sent in YOUR ID?

WB:  They sent me a letter saying they never got it.  I figured cause I showed it to you, you would take care of it.

Me:  That was 2 months ago!!  I told you to go get a pic taken and gave you money.  Where’s the picture?

WB:  I forgot.  Why didn’t you remind me?  I only have 10 days now.

Me:  And you wonder why I’m worried about you on your own.  Book smart, reality dense.

This morning via text:

WB:  Where’s my camera?

Me:  I’ll bite.  Where’s your camera?

WB:  Seriously Mom, where did I put it.

Me:  Re-read that text.

WB:  Just tell me where I would’ve put it!!!!!!  I’m going to be late for school.

Me:  No clue as it’s YOURS and I’m at work.

WB:  Thanks for nothing.

Me:  I worry for this country’s future.

This afternoon via text:

WB:  Hey, can you get Dad a father’s day card for me.

Me:  No.

WB:  I’m busy.  Please!

Me:  Doing?

WB:  At the lake for the festival.  Love you forever if you do.

Me:  Empty promise.  I’m footing the bill for school.

Me:  Cripes are you lazy.

WB:  You rock!  Love ya.

Me:  I didn’t say yes.

…..no reply.  And yes I bought the card.  A little worried about him functioning on his own.  Scurvy anyone?

WB spent the day at the University he’ll be attending in the fall for Science Day.  I know, the kid is a closet geek.  But a cute geek.

I would like to note, before I go on about our conversation, that it was the first truly warm, sunny day here in quite sometime.  About 80F.  May have some thing to do with WB’s observations.

The text messages:

WB:  On my way back.

Me:  Did you have a good time?  Learn something?

WB:  I love the Science lab.  I could live there.  And I love Guelph!

Me:  And you love the bars, the no parents, no harping mother….

WB:  Holy Shit, the girls Mom!

Me:  Put your eyes back in your head.

WB:  Ha, Ha.  Seriously, the ratio is like 5 girls for every guy.  Holy crap!

Me:  I’m not paying $15K a year for you to get lucky.  Focus!!  Education!!!

WB:  I know but seriously.  The girls!!  University rocks.

It’s going to be an interesting first year.

Mother’s Day has never been a big thing around here.  Usually we take my Mom out for dinner and WB drops one liners like “Isn’t this day over at noon, like April Fool’s?”

This year was a little different.  My sister and her fiance are house hunting in the over priced city of Toronto and could not make dinner this year.  So, my Mom chose the pub and we agreed to meet at 6pm.

WB had spent the week end at the girlfriend’s and sent me a text saying he may be a couple minutes late.  By the time he showed, my Mom and I had made a dent in the baked brie and our pints of Stella.

In true boy fashion, he whipped 2 cards out from inside his hoodie and wished us both a Happy Mom’s Day.  I thought it was beyond sweet that he got a card for his Grandma and that he went on inside about how proud of her he was.  Then came my card.  Anybody cried in a crowded pub before?  I don’t advise it, especially when everyone down to the dishwasher knows you.

The card was a little cheesy, but here is what he wrote inside:

“First of all I apologize for the cheesy card, I know it’s not our style.  For 18 years now you’ve put up with all the crap I’ve thrown at you…I’m impressed to say the least.  You’re always there for me through thick and thin and I’d like to think I’ve done the same for you.  You’ve made me the man I am and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I love you so much, WB”

Yes, my eyes watered.  Ok, maybe a tear or two escaped.

It wasn’t till we got home that WB confessed he had bought the cards on his way home from the girlfriend’s and was so under prepared that he even had to buy a package of pens to fill out the cards.  He’s such a boy.

Hope everyone had a wonderful Mother’s Day! 

Apparently my less than hospitable mood has created a new game (kind of like Where’s Waldo?) for those subjected to my presence the past few days.  The following questions have been asked:

Are you pregnant? – *shudder*  NO!!!

Is it that time of the month? – Seriously, how old are you?  16?

Are you going thru the change of life? – I’m not that lucky.

Is it because you’re not getting any on a regular basis? – Again, are we back in high school? 

Is it because your little sister is getting married before you? – Banging head on desk.

Are you finally realizing how old you are? – Couldn’t catch that person to hit them.

What could you possibly be pissy about?  Your life is perfect. – What colour is the sky in your world?  Is it pretty?

Rhino found someone else, didn’t he?- Not to my knowledge, but thanks for adding to the shit floating thru my head.

So, just to keep everything clear – nothing earth shattering is wrong, I’m in a funk.  Maybe it’s the less than stellar May weather, maybe it’s my job, maybe it’s my desperate need for a haircut and no time, maybe it’s just a funk.  Regardless, I am taking some wonderful advice and am sitting here in my jammies, having a couple glasses of wine and looking forward to a solid 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep.  Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

I am in the mother of all bad moods.  Not sure what exactly brought it on, why it’s sticking around or why I can’t shake it.  The phrase argumentative bitch would be an endearment right now.

So, here’s a WB funny.

Me:  Have you completed the online form for Residence yet?

WB:  Yep and guess what?

Me:  What?

WB:  I applied to the all girls residence.  And when they deny my application…… I’m claiming discrimination.  Awesome plan huh?

Me:  And so it begins.

It wasn’t even my birthday and I’m still trying to recover.

Sunday was a success with lots of food, good company, laughs and alcohol.  Oh the margaritas.  WB received, among other things, a new digital camera, a 3 in 1 printer for school and a varsity jacket IOU.  Oh and surprise concert tickets to see these guys, compliments of moi!

Last night was dinner out with some other family members and not home till after 9pm.  Too much food and too many late nights make me a slug.

And yes the Man Weekend was a success in that no one was arrested and they all came home with the same number of tattoos that they left with – for WB that’s ZERO.  The only downside was the Canadian team they went to see lost.  Oh and WB did 18 shots of tequila for his birthday on Friday.  Not sorry I missed that or the morning after.