As Josie’s world turns

June 20, 2008 at 1:43 pm (Rhino, The Ex)

First, I’m sorry for worrying anyone.  Was not my intention to create drama.

We’ve been experiencing a great deal of upheaval here since Wednesday and while I am maintaining an outward appearance of “I’m ok” – I can barely form a coherent thought on the inside.

Rhino discovered he had a 13 year old daughter Wednesday night.  Apparently her mother (an ex of Rhino’s) found his contact info and gave it to her.  The young girl called my house looking for Rhino Wednesday night.  When I offered to take a message and pass it on, she referred to herself as his daughter.  I assumed one of his buddies was playing a prank.

I emailed Rhino the message, along with a list of things we needed to do this week end.  Within 5 minutes my phone rang.  He recognized the last name but wanted to make sure I got the first name right.  He thought I had taken a message from his ex.  I clarified the name and mentioned that it was a young girl that called, not a woman.

This is the point where my stomach started doing the roller coaster.

He called me back 30 minutes later saying he had a flight home first thing in the morning.  Oh and that girl?  Yeah, she’s a daughter I never knew I had.

Cue full blown nausea.

What I know at this point:

The “mother” has decided she’s tired of all the responsibility and thinks it’s Rhino’s turn.

Rhino and his “daughter” are getting DNA testing done today before we go any further.

She attends the same school as WB and they live 5 blocks from us. 

Needless to say, Rhino is in a state of shock.  He is one of the most honourable men I know and the fact that he has had a daughter out there for 13 years that he was not supporting is killing him.  The fact that this woman kept her from him for 13 years has made him angrier than I have ever witnessed.

He called “the Ex” last night and there was a lot of yelling, swearing and a slamming of the phone at the end.  Suffice it to say this woman basically wants to dump her child as it’s become a hindrance in her life.  That alone makes me want to move this girl into our home ASAP – DNA or not.

So we are now sitting and waiting.  We hope to have the results by Monday – Tuesday.  This week end is going to involve a lot of “what if” talks and some serious drinking.  I know I shouldn’t but I figure a couple vodkas are worth the subsequent pain.  I’m in need of some numbness.

 

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Oops!

May 1, 2008 at 12:08 pm (The Ex, The comedy act that is my life)

I was working at the Pub last night when the following text messaging occurred. 

Who I thought was Rhino (WITWR):  Miss you.  Love you.

Me:  Miss you too hon. 

WITWR: You don’t love me anymore?

Me:  Of course I do.  WB’s pumped for this week end.

WITWR:  So happy you still love me.  Can I call you?

Me:  Have you been drinking?  Why would you ask if you could call?

WITWR:  I’m not drunk.  Won’t your fiance mind if I call?

That was when I actually looked at the number the texts were coming from.  My ex, drunk Jamie.

In my defence – I don’t get a lot of “Miss you and love you’s” from anyone but Rhino.  My phone’s been turned off ever since.

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A little back story

June 19, 2007 at 8:49 am (Stuff, The Ex)

For 3 years I dated Jamie.  The first 6 months were great.  He treated me like gold, was good to Wonder Boy.  We could talk for hours about anything and everything.  Then the wheels fell off the cart.

It started as little things – making plans and then cancelling them at the last minute with lame excuses.  Drinking too much and being an ass to me in public.  Getting caught in a couple white lies.  All this eventually escalated.

His drinking went from going out and having a couple with the boys to all out binge drinking.  And Jamie is not a nice drunk.  He became verbally abusive when he’d had too much to drink and he had a knack for being downright vicious.

Why did I keep seeing him?  Chalk it up to low self esteem and insecurity.  repeating patterns that my mother played out with my father.  And there was a part of me that hoped he would go back to the person I knew at the beginning.

Long story short – I ended things back in November after a particularly bad night.  Jamie was so verbally abusive that one of his friends (who were not my favourite bunch of people) pulled me aside and asked me what I saw in him.  I don’t know why that suddenly woke me up, but it did and I’m thankful.

After ending things, I was forced to change my phone #’s because of excessive calls and have his email blocked by our IT department.  I hit a point where I couldn’t take it anymore when he started calling the office, so I got had a letter drafted by a lawyer and sent it by courier – UPS.  Needless to say, I still had to get restraining order.

So, imagine the laughter yesterday when I discovered UPS had swapped out his address for ours and was sending all our supplies there.  If I didn’t have the email, I would think I dreamt it.

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ROFL

June 18, 2007 at 2:39 pm (Stuff, The Ex, The comedy act that is my life)

Ok, so I’ve been trying to get supplies from UPS for over a month now.  They keep saying they are shipping them and I never get them.

Today I get a snarky email from them with tracking #’s etc and the address they have been sending them to.  The address is drunk Jamie’s ( an ex) address.  I sent one pkg from here to him with the letter from the lawyer etc.  I don’t know how, but they swapped out our mailing address with his.

So, in the last month he’s had 75 envelopes and 50 labels sent to his house and not said a word.  Ahhh, the power of a restraining order.

Some girls drunk dial, some stalk, some key cars….me, I send ya courier supplies.

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Bora Bora anyone?

March 23, 2007 at 1:41 pm (Friends, The Ex, Wonder Boy, Work)

Reasons to purchase a one way ticket and move to a hut on the beach in Bora Bora:

- after talking to my boss for 30 min about an upcoming conf call – on said conf call he states he has no idea why he’s there.  Buddy’s lucky I didn’t have a coffee cup to throw at him

- blocking out an entire evening to help a member with their training and e commerce site, only to have said member stand me up.

- $462.75 for Rugby season this year……Wonder boy has grown 2.5 inches since last yr and nothing fits.

- my ex boyfriend calling / emailing after St Patty’s day.  

- entire system at work crashing, resulting in over 156 calls and an overload of our voicemail.

- losing all the updates I just spent 3 days keying / calculating because of said crash.

- the faucet in my shower / bath shooting off the wall to hit me in the shin and cause a minor flood in said bathroom.

- the first spring like weather arriving and not being able to wear a skirt beause of “shooting faucet” and resulting horrid purple, green, red bruise / bump on shin.

- standing in my kitchen barefoot watching the coffee brew, half awake and having a mouse run across my foot.

- sitting on my glasses and rendering them useless…and subsequently me.

Reasons to love my life:

- dinner with 2 of my best girlfriends last night.

- “loot bag” of free Revlon Hair products from one of my best girlfriends.

- laughing so hard my sides hurt and I was crying.

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Weekend re cap

March 19, 2007 at 3:46 pm (Friends, The Ex)

Random things from the weekend:

I make an awesome spicy avocado dip and hot spinach dip.  I also apparently rock based on the selection of late night munchies available in my cupboards.  I must give some credit to Wonder Boy for this collection.

Apparently 6 women consuming 12 bottles of wine, 1 40 oz. of tequila and numerous beers is shocking to my mother when she stopped by unannounced Sunday morning.  My son “Standard for you ladies.”

I made three new boyfriends on Saturday’s “St Paddy’s Day” pub crawl….granted they were all over the age of 60, but what girl couldn’t use a sugar daddy?

My girlfriends are the best.  Ex boyfriend siting had all the girls ready to go into battle – not needed, we just circled each other, but they still had my back.

Running into an old boss who decided to be our token male and whom has expressed keen interest in me!!!  As a female, not an employee!!!  Considering my face was sporting 4 Guinness tattoos that’s saying a lot.

Who knew 6 women could wreak that much havoc on one little house in 48 hours?  Molly Maid anyone??

Waking up both mornings with no hangover made me think I should always schedule these for one week after convention – liver is still intoxicated and doesn’t know any better.

My diet – shot to shit…..but back on the truck as of this morning.

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Odds and sods

March 14, 2007 at 8:24 am (The Ex, Wonder Boy, Work)

I have finally recovered from Convention, which seems to get harder and harder as I get older.  We’re gone for 5 or 6 days, working 16 hour days and usually hanging out in a bar till all hours.  While it’s great to see everyone from our US offices and meet new people – I am getting way too ancient.  This old body needs more than 4 hours of sleep a night to function properly. 

The Gaylord Texan is a gorgeous resort but the prices!!  $32.00 for Sunday brunch – WTF!!  Are you kidding me??  Factor in the exchange and this girl was looking at $38.00 just for some eggs and bacon.  And in terms of what was available at the brunch – not what I’m use to seeing that’s for sure.  On the flip side, the Margarita Bar lived up to its name and everyday at 4:30 we found our way there for $3.00 Margaritas that made me feel like I was in Mexico and all I was missing was a cute cabana boy and sand between my toes. 

Wonder Boy left Monday for his Dad’s for a couple days as its Spring Break up here.  Before leaving the boy willingly did laundry, cleaned his room and made dinner one night without being asked, prompted, bribed or threatened.  Now, I’ve had this parenting gig for almost 17 years now, so I know something’s up.  When I asked what he’d done or wanted the response was, “Nothing Mom.  Just missed you.”   

Obviously jet lagged and sleep deprived from the trip, I bought it.  This ladies and gents was my first mistake.  Upon returning home Monday night from work, I found forms on the kitchen counter for a Rugby trip to England – overall cost $2400.  I also discovered a mid term report from school – which he’d been carrying around since school let out 5 days earlier – showing an abundance of absences that I was unaware of.  His grades – good – but that doesn’t excuse the skipping.  See, he buttered me up by helping out, disappeared from the scene of the crime for a couple of days and hopes when he returns I’ll have forgotten (old age) or have calmed down about the absences.  And sadly, he’s probably right. 

And last but not least, received a voice mail from my ex boyfriend.  We split up – and not amicably – this past December.  I went thru all the phases – crying, anger, eating twice my weight in chocolate – and came out the other side okay.  I can honestly say I have not thought of him in a couple weeks.  As soon as I heard his voice last night, my stomach started turning and my hands started to shake.  This is not someone I want back in my life.  There is no “staying friends” with this man.  I have no intention of calling him back, but I am now weary of checking my messages – he is able to leave a msg without actually calling thru.  Why is it our mistakes always seem to come back to haunt us?

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